It is not a secret that the world is full of a constant stream of messages telling us we are not good enough. Most of us have been taught from a young age that we need to seek things outside of our selves, to give us purpose and meaning in life. These messages come from all over. Our friends, parents, magazines, social media, tv, movies, even our own brains can be out to get us. It leaves us desperately searching for that magic formula that creates the best life possible, the book of life and how to live it, but unfortunately, for some of us, we cant seem to find it.
For me (Hi! It's Brooke again) this left me selfishly wandering the earth consuming anything I could to make me "feel good" for as many fleeting moments as possible. I ended up a pretty serious alcoholic, 215lbs and on the brink of losing my spouse, my home, my business and my children. I was desperate to change anything and everything I could about who I was. I thought that building a business would give me the identity I always dreamed of, or maybe going to school or buying a new car, anything that could make me feel a little more important so I could hide how shitty I really felt on the inside. Needless to say, none of it worked. It all just made me feel like a giant fraud which seemed to perpetuate the drinking.
I know there are others out there that are suffering just like I was and I want nothing more than to give out a bit of hope and let you all know, there is a better life out there for you. You are good enough, actually you are exceptional! You belong and you have purpose! Your life can change for the better and you don't even need to buy a new car (unless you want to).
The Blog & Podcast
Hello Friends my name is Suzanne , and here is a little bit about my story:
Although my past does not control me any longer, it is a part of me which I embrace. I grew up in a broken home and witnessed a lethal progression of alcoholism as well as the affects of generational trauma. The effects run deep in my world, but also all of our worlds. The hurt, brokenness, and loneliness from growing up in an alcoholic home inflicted many wounds and scars. The voices I adopted as a young child in my thoughts manifested over the years which made it very difficult to have a relationship with myself let alone others. How could I make those wounds, those horrible thoughts and feelings disappear?
I vividly remember the day, in grade 7, when I fell back on my chair and let out a loud "F" bomb. I was such a timid, quiet girl whom no one noticed, but that day it all changed. First those voices disappeared instantly and second those kids who seemed unattainable to be friends with became my inner circle. I had arrived! My hunt to snuff and hide the scars and thoughts inside was birthed. I found many vices in my teens and adult life and not just booze and drugs, I could use pretty much anything even my husband and children to escape. I still can be triggered and have difficult days..down right difficult moments..
But today I am free from those haunting voices and the need to seek love in other things. I have been given this indescribable sense of Peace and Love which I only feel from the inside, what a gift! I'm 50, madly in love with my Husband of 25 years, sober half my life now, have 3 pretty awesome Adult kids, Gamma to one special little boy...and those past scars you ask? Those are real, authentic, and freakn beautiful! I am grateful for everyone of them today! I used to hate on a God religion made me believe in growing up and found a God that lives in me and continues to evolve and grow around me! There is so much magic in this world to uncover through loving on others...and learning from them..it is in my broken that I was found and hope you will be too, and if you have been found I can't wait to hear from you and all about your story!
We created this blog for the Family who is Seeking Purpose, Connection and Healing in their Recovery Journey. Be it healing from your own Addiction or Healing from the affects of another's, we are the Community for You. By sharing not only our own Experiences, Strengths, Hopes and Inspirations, we want to share in yours as well. We will generate evolving fresh topics! How to Parent Sober? How to have fun Sober? How to Love a Person in Recovery? How to find Purpose after being so Broken? Or How to press on in the Broken? Know your not alone and there are Resources available! There is incredible Family Transformations that are made everyday! Celebrate the Moments! Our Hope is that you Hear something you can Connect with and leave feeling Inspired to start your own Recovery Journey Seeking Purpose.